There are times in life when we are reminded that we are not finished yet, the story we have been telling ourselves about who we are and where our life is headed has yet to be written. Such moments come very quickly at the beginning of something new.
Starting anything – a new habit, a new project, a new passion – is cool versus stagnant. Beginnings are the notes of a symphony of what is possible for us. They ask us to break the pattern of our lives and reshape them – something that can only be done with great courage and great compassion, because there is no place in life that reveals both our strengths and our vulnerabilities more vividly than the beginning.
How to leap into the exciting and terrifying unknown of possibility is what Irish poet and philosopher John O'Donohue (January 1, 1956–January 4, 2008) explores in his farewell chapter, Blessing the Space Between Us: A Book of Blessings (public library), who also gave us his enlightening meditations by kindling the light between us and within us.
He begins by seeing telescopes in deep time, reminding us that we are a small and new part of something old and very large – the great essence that holds us in our imperfection, in our existential loneliness, in the vulnerability of our own creation:
There are days when Conamara is bathed in Tuscan green light. The mountains seem to sway as if they were great black ships on a long journey. I love going up to the quiet of these large private buildings. What appears to be a gentle peak from below becomes a level plateau when you get there. Born from the red explosion of a rising fire, the rock is cold, unseen by millions of years of rain and wind. In this ancient realm I feel I have entered a pure state, continuing here knowing the spirit of hundreds of millions of years before the face of man was heard.
When we come to earth, we enter this ancient chain. All of our initiatives take place within this continuum. Beginnings often scare us because they seem like a lonely journey into the unknown. However, in reality, there is no empty or solitary beginning. We seem to think that the beginning is from the lonely place along a certain line to the unknown. That's not the case. The place to live and the power becomes alive when the beginning is accepted… We are never alone in our beginning as it may seem at the time. The beginning is ultimately an invitation to open the gifts and growth that is in store for us. Refusing to start would be an act of great self-neglect.
[…]
Our existence here is directly dependent on the first actions that continue.
Just as our lives are shaped by those necessary ends – by what we choose to stop – they are shaped by what we choose to start, however dangerous the new cliff.
A century after Van Gogh reveled in the risks of the creative life and a decade after David Bowie urged young artists to “always go a little further into the water than you feel you can,” adds O'Donohue:
Perhaps the art of reaping the secret treasures of our lives is best achieved when we place deep hope in the first act. Risk can be our greatest helper. To live a truly creative life, we need to constantly look closely at where we are now, always trying to see where we stand and where a new beginning might be ripe. There can be no growth if we are not always open and vulnerable to what is new and different. I've never seen someone take a risk to grow that wasn't rewarded a thousand times over.
And yet we are machines of homeostasis, our very nature inclined to maintain a status quo of comfort and predictability, which every beginning inevitably disrupts with complete change and its burden of uncertainty. O'Donohue looks at what it takes to override our natural reflex to stay:
Sometimes the biggest challenge is getting started; there is something deep in us that includes that which wishes to remain within safe limits and not change… Sometimes a period of preparation is needed, during which the concept of the beginning can grow and refine itself; but we often procrastinate unnecessarily and overestimate when we should just take a risk and jump into a new beginning.
He offers the vulnerability and redemption of that leap in the poem – a kind of self-blessing to sanctify the initial courage:
WITH A NEW BEGINNING
by John O'DonohueIn places outside the heart's path,
When your thoughts don't think to wander,
This beginning was made in peace,
Waiting until you are ready to show up.It has long been looking at your desire,
Feeling emptiness grow inside you,
Realizing how serious you are,
You still haven't been able to leave what you used to be.He watched you play with security
And gray promises that the same whispered,
He heard the waves of chaos rise and fall,
He wondered if he would stay like this.Then joy, when your courage burns,
And he went out to a new place,
Your eyes are fresh and strong and dreamy,
The path of abundance opens before you.Even if your destination is still unclear
You can trust the promise of this opening;
Open yourself to the first grace
That is in line with your life's desire.Awaken your spirit to adventure;
Don't hold anything back, learn to find ease in danger;
Soon you will be home with a new rhythm,
Because your soul feels the world that awaits you.
Sometimes – in fact, often – beginnings are included in endings. In line with philosopher-poet David Whyte's tragic meditation on ending love and beginning love, O'Donohue writes:
Often when something ends, we find within it the spore of a new beginning, and a new train of possibility is moving before we notice it. When the heart is ready for a new beginning, unexpected things can happen. And in a sense, this is exactly what the startup is doing. It is an opportunity for miracles. By revolving around purpose and initiative, there are always exciting possibilities.
Paying attention to those portals may be an act of self-respect and respect for life:
Part of the art of living wisely is learning to recognize and pay attention to such profound opportunities in one's life.
Complete with poet Pattian Rogers' stunning ode to our continued creativity and poetic psychoanalyst Allen Wheelis on how people change, revisit John O'Donohue's why we love, the essence of friendship, and how we bless each other.
